Get Your Cake, Even If You Can’t Eat It!

With a milestone birthday on the way, months of deteriorating health finally explained, a lifestyle change in the early stages of being implemented, insomnia, and a lot of uncertainty/anxiety, what would you do?

If you answered throw yourself a house warming/35^th birthday party and bake lots of delicious treats that you were recently told not to eat, than you are correct!

I love winter. January is my favorite month; coincidentally my birthday is in January. As the years go by and more and more of my friends shun birthdays and complain about getting older, I have taken the opposite approach. I believe that your birthday is a day to celebrate yourself, and it should be done with a lot of enthusiasm. January 15, 2012 was a fantastic day. I didn’t let Lyme disease dampen my birthday spirit.

I enlisted the help of two friends, Rachael and Miss S, to help plan and execute my party. Even though they thought it was a bizarre idea for me to make all sorts of sugary treats that I couldn’t eat, they went along with my plan to bake every single dessert I planned on having for my party from scratch. While I was preoccupied with baking, they were making sure that all of the finger food (hot and cold), drinks, utensils, etc were purchased and ready to go by the time the party started (you know all of the logistical stuff that usually the hostess would be worried about).

I know this is going to sound funny since I planned my own party, but my birthday was full of surprises. Not just for me, but for my guests too. I’ve been living in Washington DC for almost 18 years and I have met a lot of people. I don’t see everyone all of the time, but I invite everyone to my birthday celebrations. The first surprise came in the form of the fact that I had bought a condo at the end of August. Quite a few people didn’t know I had moved and were caught off guard with the all encompassing housewarming/birthday event they were invited to.  Besides a nice photo collection of my teddy bear doing various things around my new condo that was posted on FB, I don’t think I sent out any official new home announcement. (If I did, I accidentally left a lot of people off of it). The second surprise came in the form of me neglecting to tell the masses I was sick. Even those that knew about the Lyme disease, were not necessarily up to date on my food and drink restrictions. When you’re preoccupied with health issues and are accidentally putting toilet paper in your fridge when unpacking your groceries, you may forget to share major details about your life with some/most of your friends. Just in case you were wondering, chilled toilet paper is delightful. 

For about eight hours during my party, the logistics crew manned the stove and the door buzzer; they made sure all of the finger foods were constantly replenished and that all of the guests were let into the building upon their arrival. It was an open-house so there weren’t too many people jammed into my place at one time. Meanwhile, I happily bounced around and chatted with everyone while snacking on my private stash of Lyme-disease friendly food. 

My guests, many of whom arrived with wine and liquor; the perfect housewarming/birthday party gift, had a lot of questions for me about Lyme disease once the news began to spread. This is where that second surprise came into play. Many of my friends expressed concern upon hearing about my health issue, and were a bit perplexed as to why I had not mentioned I was sick and not allowed to drink, thereby rendering their gifts useless. Allow me to explain the awesomeness that is having a fully stocked liquor cabinet when you cannot drink. For nine months, until my supply recently ran out, I was handing out alcohol like it was free to all of my friends at various events. Everyone who got the gift of liquor or wine from me was impressed with my exquisite taste. It couldn’t have worked out better if I had planned it.

The last surprise came in the form of this Costco cake that Rachael and Miss S presented me with: 

And just like that, my clean eating (which at this point had been flawless for about a month and a half) went out the window. How could I not laugh and then have a tiny piece of cake? I probably ended up having five or six tiny pieces of cake and a Coors Light to wash it all down. 

My birthday was on a Sunday; by Tuesday morning I could barely lift my head off of my pillow. My whole body ached and I felt really ill. The combination of the cake and beer turned into my first lesson regarding the effects of what the food I was told not to eat would do to my body if consumed.

Have I eaten cake since then?

Does Key Lime Pie count as cake?