Throwback Tuesday

Throwback Thursday is a weekly post theme that many social media users like to participate in. It is all about selecting an appropriately nostalgia-inducing picture – from a different era of your life, and then hash-tagging the crap out of it before posting it online. For the purpose of what has prompted me to write today, I'm calling it Throwback Tuesday. It’s no big deal though because some people post selfies that were taken 12 hours earlier in the day for Throwback Thursday, so as you can see, the unwritten rules about throwback Thursday are often stretched.

Two years ago today, during the era when I could still run, I participated in my last race before my body crapped out on me. I had unofficially diagnosed myself with Lyme disease by this point, but it would still be another two months before meeting my current doctor and beginning treatment. You can click here and also here for refreshers on my frustrating path to getting diagnosed.

Long before I started this blog I used to craft “Race Reports” to share with my friends and family after each of my events. I really miss competing in races and sharing my experiences, so today I reached into my archives and pasted my last race report into this post. I also took the liberty to correct a few grammatical errors, and in the process probably created a few more. Drum roll please...

Ragnar Relay DC - Race Recap

On September 23-24, 2012 I had the opportunity to participate in the Ragnar Relay DC event as part of the "Captain Awesome and His Bag of Monkeys" team. And, well... it was awesome!

A quick overview of Ragnar Relay DC

The race started in Cumberland MD and ended 200 miles later at the National Harbor in Washington DC. Each team that participated had 12 runners and two vans. Each person ran 3 times throughout the race. Each leg of the race varied in mileage. There is, of course, always one exception. The ultra teams. These teams were made up of 6 runners and one van and they split up the 200 miles between six runners. Ouch. They are crazy. One day I suspect I will be part of a Ragnar Ultra team. The race start was staggered so 10 - 12 teams started every hour on Friday for a good part of the morning into the early afternoon.


Each running leg is mapped out beforehand and the team Captain assigns each runner a position (1-12). Information about each of the 33 running legs of the race is distributed to each team detailing the mileage of each leg, written directions, maps, and descriptions of the areas that the runners will be running through. Runners 1- 12 on each team run in the same order for the whole time from start to finish. After each leg is completed, a slap bracelet is passed off between runners instead of a baton like you see in those much shorter relays that they run at track and field events. While one person is running, the vans are following and cheering them on. (Or getting food and trying to sleep depending on the time of day and which van of runners is running).

I was on a 12 person team and signed up for the shortest amount of mileage possible due to my chronic leg injury that makes it hard to run (yet I keep running). In total I ran 12.2 miles out of the 200.

If you ask my leg, that was 12.2 miles too many.

If you ask me, I say "What could be more fun than riding in a van for almost two days with 5 people I had never met with an inflatable monkey tied to the back door, telling dirty jokes and pretending that the stinky and muddy running clothes that were piling up did not smell like freshly raked mulch on a 100 degree day"?

I was runner #5, part of the first van. Here is a summary of my running journey. Our team started at 11 am on Friday, Sept 23rd.

Leg 5 (my first run of the day): 4.3 Mile "Mud" Run

Highlights from the description of Leg 5: "Switchbacks and some steep climbs await you. Prepare for Dust. VANS - THIS ROAD HAS A FEW NARROW PARTS, USE CAUTION, WATCH FOR RUNNERS, AND DRIVE SLOWLY".

It was a rainy morning. Runners 1-4 got caught in some downpours. When I got out of the van to run the rain had let up. I soon found myself ankle deep in a long and winding mud pit, which before the rain I am sure was a dusty dirt road with switchbacks and steep climbs.

I was running along feeling great, trying to get into my groove which proved to be hard because I had gobs of mud stuck to my sneakers. My teammates drove past me in the van honking and cheering and then they were out of sight. I was concentrating on trying not to slip in the mud when I started hearing loud noises in the distant woods that sounded an awful lot like spinning tires stuck in the mud on a steep hill. As it turns out, I was correct! There were MANY vans stuck in the mud up ahead of me, including my team van. The hill happened to be one of those narrow parts mentioned in the description.

I was covered in mud from the waist down sliding all over the place with mud cakes for shoes (mud cakes don't have terrific traction). One minute I was trying not to slip while running up hill, and the next minute I was darting/sliding all over the road in an attempt to avoid the vans that were sliding sideways and backwards down/across the same hill I was attempting to get to the top of. I heard a lot of cheers as I passed my van sliding around in the mud. Many vans got stuck that morning, leaving their runners stranded at the next checkpoint until they could get out of the mud and deliver runner #6. My teams van was able to navigate through the mud pit and around the vans that couldn't climb the hill. They honked as they left me in their muddy tracks as they headed toward the exchange.

Going down the hills in the mud was not much better as I was trying to keep from sliding and falling forward which in turn put a lot of strain on my leg. Between that and my muddy shoes that felt like they weighed ten pounds each, I am sure I looked like a duck waddling down a hill. At one point I did wish I was a duck. Webbed-feet and knowing I wouldn't have far to fall if I tripped sounded amazing.

I made it to the exchange, and then happily tried to get as much mud off of me with a wet wipe as I could before I entered the van to change!

Leg 17 (my second run) 4.4 Mile "Where’s My Night Light?" Run

Highlights from the description of Leg 5: Rolling hills continue! To the north of you is Fort Ritchie Military Reservation and to the South, the famed Antietam Battlefield.

I set off for my second run at 1:32 am on September 24th. The air was thick with moisture causing a low lying fog. Visibility was about 5 feet, maybe less. At the exchange there were big spotlights, vans with their lights on waiting for their runners, and plenty of headlamps to make it appear much brighter out than it really was.

I took off running decked out with my headlamp and my blinking light so traffic and other runners could see me. The first quarter of a mile was great. Lights here and there from houses, vans passing me on the road shuttling runners to the next exchange and I was running on pavement and not slogging through mud. The team van drove past me and cheered. Then reality set in.

I was running in thick fog with low visibility. There was nobody else on the road with me because we had passed a bunch of teams throughout the first day, and hadn't quite caught the next bunch of teams that we eventually passed.

The sound of crickets filled the air, yet the silence was deafening.

On a scale of 1 to 10, one being mildly freaked out and 10 being FREAKED OUT, I was about to break the scale at a 10. I was running in the breakdown lane on the left side of the road. My light was illuminating all the brush and bushes on the side of the street. Droplets of dew were sparkling as my light swept over the bushes. Every once in a while I would see a mailbox. In front of me I could see the lines on the road, but they looked like they were disappearing into a black hole due to the fog. When I would reach a hill the road literally looked like it was dropping into nothing because I couldn't see over the crest. I was curious to see what was on the right hand side of the road since I knew I was near the Antietam battlefield. About a mile into my run, I looked to the right and saw cornstalks encased in fog. And then this happened...

The minute I saw cornstalks (which looked down right ghastly in the fog), I thought of Malachi and the Children of the Corn. Damn you Stephen King and your scary short stories! I have never had a panic attack before in my life, so I can't say with certainty that is what happened, but I really think that is what happened. My chest felt really heavy. It sounded like my breathing was echoing in a cave. All of the dew droplets on the bushes lining the side of the street turned into little beady eyes of kids who wanted to kill me and I swear I heard laughing. And then I took off. I ran the rest of this leg in a personal record setting pace. I always claim I have one speed of running. It is not that fast, but I can keep going for hours. As it turns out, in the middle of a foggy night when I think fictitious characters are going to appear out of nowhere, drag me into a corn field and kill me, I can really kick my running pace up a notch or five. My mind was working in overdrive, as were my legs. I wanted to cry (I may have). I had to keep wiping my eyelashes because the fog and my sweating were producing so much moisture it looked like I had spiders on my face when I was looking out of the corner of my eye. And then this happened...

One minute I was thinking I was covered in bugs and there were eyes on the side of the road watching me and the next minute I heard breathing. Someone was running up behind me. The footsteps got closer and closer. The road got brighter. I was about to scream and then I heard "Nice job out here tonight. You are really moving" as the one man who I saw on this leg of my race said as he passed me on my right side. At first I was blinded by his headlamp when he turned to talk to me. But then I got so excited to see someone else on the street that I started running even faster so I could keep my eyes on his blinking lights.

I was so relieved to see the Ragnar Relay checkpoint signs as I turned the final hill and ran to the exchange. I ran this leg of the race significantly faster than my first leg, even though this one was slightly longer, and for the first mile I was running my usual pace.

Leg 29 (My last run): 3.7 mile "Oh Boy! That Hurt" Run

Highlights from the description of Leg 29: Nice and flat (which was a lie... there were some hills).

I knew this last leg of my race was going to be bad news after running twice, and then trying to sleep in a van with six people in a high school parking lot all curled up in a ball after having a panic attack near the Antietam Battlefield. I was exhausted and my leg was so sore and inflamed that I could barely walk across the parking lot to the grocery store that I was going to use the bathroom at before I started my last run. I was hobbling/shuffling along the parking lot thinking to myself, 'Self, you may need to crawl this last 3.7 miles".

#backwhenicouldrun#isthatabananainyourpants
#dontspankthemoney#don'tsliponthepeel

I am happy to report that I was able to stay on my feet for the entire run, which was quite miraculous because I was tripping over everything due to the fact that my foot that was connected to my bad leg actually never left the ground. It kind of dragged itself behind me. I bet I looked funny sort of running sideways with one leg trying to move forward and one leg just trying to move whichever way it could. 

Captain Awesome and His Bag of Monkey's finished the race in 28 hours and came in 21st out of 262 teams overall, and 9th out of 50 teams in the "Mens Open" division. Even though we had men and women on the team, we didn't have enough women to qualify as a mixed team.

______________________________
Sidebar: The chronic leg injury I mentioned in this race report wasn’t caused by running. I always attributed it to running because for the four years that it bothered me it always got worse after I ran.  It turns out that when I would go for a run, I would irritate the already inflamed muscle in my leg that was being attacked by the tick-borne disease party that I had been hosting for many years, without knowledge or consent. I still have the leg pain and it comes and goes with my level of activity and inflammation. My doctor often refers to my athleticism as a thing of the past; I prefer to say I have been overcome by events and am on a training hiatus. I love competition and I love writing race reports; while it is going to take a good amount of time I can say with confidence, I’ll be back.

The Value of a Firm Handshake

“Handshaking is a very common method of transmitting the cold and influenza virus”. This quote has nothing to do with the value of a firm handshake, but I am not sure where to start today and I figured since flu shots are now available around town that this quote was somewhat topical. 

Speaking of flu shots, with my weakened immune system I have been strongly advised not to get one for the past two years. No big deal. I have only gotten one flu shot in the past ten years, it was about 6 years ago, and I got the flu shortly after receiving the shot. I have snubbed the flu shot ever since. People always look at me like I am crazy when I say I don't get the flu shot; it is the same look I get when I tell people I don’t eat processed sugar. You heard it here folks I avoid flu shots and processed sugar; gosh I am so weird. Speaking of processed sugar, Halloween is just around the corner. This means I am going to have to steer clear of the candy pushers who get ridiculously offended when I turn down candy at the office. "No thanks" I say, "I prefer to snack on these raw almonds". Nobody believes me. 

WOW! I am totally off track. My intention was to write about how my treatment to break up the biofilm (discussed in my previous post), combined with me discontinuing one of my antibiotics per my doctor's request (forgot to mention that in my previous post) has led to increased discomfort, tingly feet and crippling pain in my right hand, and I am right handed. The hand pain sucks and it happens to be the reason why my writing has slowed down. Trust me I have endless amounts of Lyme-related information and experiences to share, but by the time I get home from work it is hard for me to make a fist with my right hand and typing is the last activity that my hand wants to participate in. My hand has also been cranky about opening up jars, bottles and squeezing toothpaste out of the tube.  The hand situation also led to an interesting first two weeks at my new job which I started a month and a half ago. Additionally, I haven’t been sleeping very well for the past two weeks. I am exhausted, a little spacey and I am experiencing bad headaches. I apologize in advance for all of my rambling. (Perhaps I should have prefaced this post with the lack of sleep/headache/rambling information). I could cut and paste it, but this is a good example of what goes on in my head during the week when I am trying to work, prepare all of my food, keep up with my Lyme disease antibiotic regimen, etc., while not getting enough sleep.

Guess what. I think I just figured out how I should begin this post! On July 29^th I started a new job. Like any typical new job it involved orientation, a lot of paperwork, and shaking a lot of important people’s hands from many corners of the agency. In my mind, when meeting people for the first time whether you are in a professional or personal setting there is nothing worse than a limp handshake. Oh wait, there is. A sweaty limp handshake. Luckily for me my hand temperature is perfect. 

About three and a half weeks into my new supplement and antibiotic schedule I began to notice some changes. I had increased pain and discomfort in all of the places that usually have pain and discomfort (neck, shoulders, hips, legs, knee, etc.) and one new place; my thumb. The side of my right thumb became very tender and constantly felt like it was bruised from below my nail bed to my wrist. If I used my hand too much throughout the day the bruised feeling turned into shooting pain that radiated through the rest of my hand. I was trying to get used to this new annoyance when I experienced a herx reaction. I discussed herx reactions in November 2012 in the following posts: "And then my immune system woke up" and "Buckle up and enjoy the ride". A quick review:  A Herx reaction occurs because the Lyme bacteria, under attack from the antibiotics, start to break up and die, releasing toxins and other harmful debris as they do so. This, in turn, causes the body’s immune system to temporarily go into overdrive in order to cope with the abrupt deluge of toxins and debris.

I hadn't had a herx reaction in about six months and while I wouldn't say this was the most severe one I have experienced during my Lyme treatment, it did keep me in bed for about two and a days; Friday thru Sunday morning. When I went back to work that Monday, coincidentally my last week at my old job, I was feeling exhausted, extremely sore, achy and a little out of it. Two days later I took the day off to attend Mayhem Fest with Laikisha in Bristow, VA. What is Mayhem Fest? Mayhem Festival is a traveling metal festival that includes bands that represent a broad range of sub-genres including thrash metal, death metal, metalcore and power metal; just to name a handful. It is an all day event that involves a lot of walking around from stage to stage, standing, shopping, people watching and head banging. With my constant neck issues I did not partake in the head banging  but I will tell you watching other people throw their heads around made my neck hurt more. The picture on the top left is a fine example of a t-shirt that I refrained from buying while we browsed the merchandise. 

Laikisha and I had a lot of fun soaking up the sun and people watching while listening to the music. I am not going to lie though, walking around all day was adding to my increased aches. Take a look at the photo to the left of me throwing devil horns with a nice man that I met wearing half of a bear suit. My thumb is in the wrong spot. It is not because I don't know the proper way to rock the devil horns, it is because my thumb was too stiff to bend into the proper position. The half man/half bear didn't seem to mind, so neither did I. Long after the sun had gone down and Laikisha and I had dodged some seriously insane mosh pits, my posture was incredibly slouchy and my legs and neck were throbbing, but none of that stopped me from thoroughly enjoying Rob Zombie's performance which closed out the night. Laikisha and I left the venue covered in dust with hoarse voices and bizarre new followers on our social media accounts due to the Mayhem Fest references and pictures of Rob Zombie we had posted. At work the next day I was more exhausted, achy and robotic than usual, but I survived the last two days at my old job and had a phone full of unique photos from my Mayhem Fest experience to share with my co-workers. 

I had a weekend to rest up, but I was feeling less than rested when I reported for my first day of work on July 29th. I was stifling yawns during orientation, I was trying to ignore the pain in my hand while filling out loads of paperwork, I was limping because my knees and ankles were so sore and I was hoping that I was only wincing on the inside when people were coming in with the death grip to shake my hand. Not wanting to be known as the "new girl with the limp handshake" I tried my best to firmly shake back which on a few occasions caused my shoulder to crack. Talk about a bunch of vigorous handshakers. 

It was a good two weeks of multiple handshakes a day before my hand finally got a rest. I mentioned to a few of my friends that my thumb and hand pain had intensified due to all of the introductions at work. My hand looks totally fine to the naked eye and I didn't want people to think I was rude and making up a hand injury by not wanting to offer up my hand when they stuck theirs out. Some of my friends suggested buying a wrist brace, while others told me to lick or sneeze into my hand upon meeting people. I was trying to make a good impression. Licking or sneezing into my hand before extending it would have given off the wrong vibe, and  worse yet, if I had been sick I could have spread germs to my new colleagues if for some strange reason they still chose to shake my hand. 

Formication, Bruising & Biofilm

 “I feel like I have bugs crawling on me again” I said as I gingerly ran my hand through my hair. “It’s called formication, not to be confused with fornication” replied my doctor as he continued to scribble in his notebook while laughing at his joke. It had been about two months since my last appointment and I was sitting in a chair giving him a review of my symptoms when the subject of formication popped up. It is the physical sensation of insects crawling on your body and/or biting you---with no evidence that any are actually doing so. It can have various psycho-, neuro-, physio-, or pharmacological causes. Earlier on in my treatment I experienced this sensation over the period of a few months, sadly it has resurfaced and I am still waiting for it to subside again. You are probably wondering how I responded to the joke. I've got two words for you: Polite giggle. 

While my on-going battle with tick-borne diseases continues to spiral in multiple directions, I am thankful that at least one aspect of my experience has structure; my  appointments. We always start by discussing my symptoms; are they better or worse since my last appointment/medication change and are there any new ones to report? Next up, a brief change of scenery as my vitals are taken in a different room; occasionally an EKG is thrown in for good measure. (According to a recent warning issued by the FDA one of the antibiotics I have been on for almost two years can cause abnormal changes in the electrical activity of the heart that may lead to a potentially fatal irregular heart rhythm). After my vitals are recorded we return to the room we started in and wrap up the appointment with a discussion of my latest blood work results and medication and/or supplement adjustments. 

After I issued the polite giggle mentioned above, and before my arm was fitted with a blood pressure cuff, I dove into the details of a concern of mine regarding my toes. While getting ready for work one morning this past April I stepped into a pair of frequently worn shoes and headed out the door. Around mid-morning my big toe started throbbing but I didn’t think much of it because I am always experiencing ebbs and flows of random aches and pains throughout my body on a daily basis. Later in the day it became increasingly hard to walk and it wasn’t until I hobbled up the stairs into my condo after work and took my shoes off that I saw my swollen and angry looking toe (top picture). When I put my shoes on earlier that morning my toe was fine. When I walked to the metro and then to my office my toe was fine; it wasn't until later in the morning while sitting at my desk that my toe began to throb. The next day my toe was bruised (bottom picture) and everyone I showed it to assumed it was broken and that I had dropped something on it. Within two and a half days the swelling, the pain and the bruising in my toe had vanished. Most likely it was a burst blood vessel. Since April this has happened a hand full of times to both of my big toes while wearing various styles of comfortable shoes that are easy for me to get around in with all of my joint pain. (Translation: old lady shoes). Why is this happening? Nobody really knows, but I shall keep you posted if an answer materializes. 

In my last post I mentioned my doctor’s assumption that a Bartonella flare-up was the cause of my post travel "hangover". During the review of my blood work his assumption was confirmed and a new issue was brought to my attention. Lyme bacteria can create a biofilm that allows it to evade antibiotics. Sounds like the foundation for a creepy pandemic Lyme disease movie doesn’t it? While it is creepy, I am now taking enzymes to break down the biofilm that was so prominently featured in my blood work. Click here to read more about biofilm.

“How much longer are you going to be on the medication” and “When are you going to get better” are the two most popular questions I am being asked these days. The answer to both of those questions is very open-ended. The day I show up at an appointment to see my doctor and tell him that I am symptom free I will have a better idea about how to answer those questions. Till then I will just smile and nod and say “But I feel awful” when people respond to my not knowing the answer to their questions with an enthusiastic “Well, you look great!”